Once upon a time…

March 23, 2009

I loved a man once. A strong, brave, handsome man. He was the center of my world. He was everything I could have ever asked for. A Knight that one reads about in fairy-tales and in folk legends. A man of valor. He was a dream… and he belonged to me.

We loved each other very much. Our life was like that of the books; a fairy-tale. We had a beautiful home. We saw the world together. We fought countless foes. I was his knight and he was mine. We gave our hearts to each other, our souls, our bodies. We felt invincible. But… it was not enough. In the end it was not enough.

In the end it was all the things that had been left unsaid that tore us apart. All the secrets of our pasts. Secrets that held us back from our true love. All either of us had to do was to open our hearts to the other, to read aloud the pages of our story, to know the characters of the book. We failed at doing that.

For such things… I can not blame him for finding another. Another who would know his story and share her own. It mattered little to him all the things I had sacrificed for him, for us. So much I had given him, yet so little of myself I had truly given.

Keeping my heart under such a tight seal, with a lock and no key to be found. Tossed over board of some ship, the key lied at the bottom of the Great Sea, perhaps. Swallowed by a great sea monster, never to be seen again. Never would the seal of my heart be opened.

I was foolish. Making mistake after the other. Never being able to repair the damage.

He turned his back to me. Walked away. The sound of the waves crashed in my ears. I could hear nothing else. Just a constant swelling. My chest tightened. It burned from within, threatening to burn through and consume me.

Then he had returned to me, but for a brief moment. Secret moments. Long evenings of love and lust. Losing myself in the moments of the past. Always wanting to be what was… I wanted my Knight to return to me. He never did.

Now this Knight… this man. I do not know him anymore. I barely know his face. He is not the man of my memories. The one I remember with candle light flickering off his perfect features. Illuminating his emerald gems that were his eyes. Now in my mind the face was dark, unfamiliar, and frightening.

What had he become?

Was this all because of me?

Am I to blame?

What had ever happened to our ever after?

There would be no ever after… no happily living couple in the quarters of the great Ironforge. No tiny family. No little ones of golden and crimson locks.

There would be none of that for me. All that I had dreamed for. All that I had hoped for. Gone. With a few simple words. It vanished like the early morning fog in the forest at sunrise.

His life would continue. He would forget me. He would find another to share his sunrises with, his sunsets, and late evenings, candle lit dinners that melted into passionate deserts. He would be happy without me.

Would I be happy with out him?

I would manage to go on… and I would still believe in fairy-tales.

The Knight of my story had not come yet, and I would wait for him.