September 22nd

September 22, 2009

It has been nearly two weeks to the day that my husband went missing. No one has seen nor heard from him in that time. I have received no letter, no package, no messenger from him. His squires have seemed to simply… disappear as well. I doubt they truly have. More than likely they have taken this opportunity with no supervision as a sign to cause some trouble while on their own.

Two weeks. Two very long weeks. Two weeks of worry. Two weeks of little sleep. Two weeks of growing suspicions.

What if… he left me for someone else? What if he has done what Dredin did to me before? What if I was never good enough? What if all I was to him was nothing but a prize? So many questions, and so few answers. Answers that I know may never come. But then…

If he has left me, would others have at least seen him? They could not all be conspiring against me.

… Could they? The better question should be ‘Would they?’ and my answer is no. There are far too many I know that also know him that he would have to pay in order to keep their secret to themselves. I feel, logically speaking, that he has not left me, and is in fact missing. But if he is missing, why can they not find him? Truly a mystery.

I pray he has not fallen to a terrible fate. Malafir is an exceptional swordsman. He is unmatched by any other. I know he has not simply been taken over. Something larger than he ever could have expected must have happened. Something he was not prepared for.

The search parties shall continue their search, another group tomorrow. But… I doubt they will find him. The hope I have for the return of my husband begins to dwindle. I only hope that if he is truly gone, that he did not suffer long. My prayers will always be with him, and his memory shall not die in the eyes of his daughter.

OOC- New storyline

September 13, 2009

Just to let everyone know, I’ve got a big storyline in the works and I will probably start it off some time next week. Stay tuned for many many posts and updates about Kam. Thanks for reading. ❤

Dear…

September 10, 2009

I know I have said and done some very hurtful things. Just know how very, truly sorry I am. I would give anything to have you back in my life. You were my best friend, and I loved you. I still love you.

I am writing this in hopes that you will forgive me, but I know, deep in my heart of hearts, that forgiveness is not something I can ask for at this time. I do not even fully believe I am worthy of forgiveness for what I have done to you. All the pain I saw in your eyes. All the sorrow in your voice. The way I saw you shall forever haunt my dreams, and pound in my ears.

Oh to turn back the hands of time… to make everything right again. To undo all the wrongs I have done to you. Such things are not possible and thus I must live with the consequences of my actions. Thus I must live with out you in my life. But what sort of life is this? It is but half of what it could be were you to return to your place.

The nights continue on, and I feel alone. So distant from everything, from everyone. Have I truly run out of those who care for me? It seems I have. But I shall not pity myself, nor ask for pity. I deserve neither.

But I digress… I only want for you to know that I feel truly, deeply sorry for what I have done. You may, one day, find it in your heart to forgive me. And I shall wait anxiously until that day. I pray it is sooner rather than later.

I keep you in my prayers and in my thoughts. May the Light always, -always- bless you with its holy radiance, and grant you the warming, wonderful dreams you deserve.

In the Light,

~Kamillia

Lying fortunes

September 9, 2009

“Have dinner with me?”

She thought about his words and what they could possibly mean. A married woman having dinner with a male who was not her husband. He was only her friend, but what would others think of their rendezvous?

“I am sorry, Brandon, but I cannot accept your invitation.”

Immediately her thoughts went to that Darkmoon Faire fortune that the blind Gnoll had given her; ‘Accept the next proposition you hear’.

This was one proposition she could not accept. It was not acceptable for married women to have late dinners with male companions who were not their husbands. Even if she was lonely due to Malafir’s lack of presence it gave her no right to seek that attention from someone else. She would stay loyal and faithful to her husband until she knew for certain what was going on. Of course Brandon only meant for their meal to be between friends, but she could not help but think there was something more he desired from her. She saw the way he looked at her, and the way he chose his words. He would not openly say it, but he did not need to. Kamillia could see his intent, and she would not allow for him to think she was easily swayed.

Once Brandon had left, she reached into her pocket to produce the folded and wrinkled fortune. Her eyes moved over the paper to read it again.

“Silly things. They are always false,” she says as she lets the wind take the paper from her hand. She watched it float on the breeze for several moments before turning to walk back into the city.

Kamillia’s emerald eyes met those of the dark haired woman, and both wondered immediately about the other. How did she know him? His sister? Kamillia could have about fallen over. His sister… a travesty. Malafir spoke first to correct the woman. Informing her that Kamillia was actually his wife. That did little to help quell Kamillia’s suspicions. The woman acted so shocked upon hearing that Malafir was wed. She could barely find the words. Needless to say, the woman took her leave shortly after learning of such things. By that act alone it was made painfully obvious to all around that there was something more that Kamillia was unaware of.

“Someone from the courts. She had it in her mind to seduce me to secure her place. We accused her of dark magics.”

Part of that she could believe. Yes, she may have wanted to seduce him to secure her place among the courts. Would he have said no? So many questions lingered in her mind. Looking at him, she saw his lips moving, but there was no sparkle to his eyes. Why would he lie to her? Little did Kamillia know, but her good friend and watchful companion, the daughter of the Blade of Elune , Acaysa, was following behind this dark woman to learn the truth. Acaysa had noticed the odd exchange, and the obvious hesitation in Kamillia’s voice. There had to be something more to this than a simple incorrect address or forgotten missive to inform the courts of Malafir’s wedded status.

Indeed, there was something more and Acaysa told Kamillia all she knew. The woman told Kamillia’s elven friend that which Acaysa had feared. Kamillia’s fears were also confirmed. What could she do now? There was little. She could not blame this woman. It was not her fault. For what she was told, she took at face value, that Malafir was being honest with her. There was no blame for this other woman. None at all, and Kamillia held no ill will towards her, though many would have given her the right to.

Then the doubt came, like a wave of cold water… Perhaps the woman was lying to Acaysa so that it would cause Malafir and I to argue and subsequently end our marriage. She would gain from that, because then Malafir would be available for her advances. Or perhaps the woman was speaking the truth. If she was speaking truthfully, then when it did it occur? How recently or how long ago? Or perhaps… but then… maybe…

The questions filled her mind, pushing away the happy thoughts of her daughter’s newly acquired friends, the Darcy children; Caleb, Jacob, D.J, and little Victoria. They were to all meet on a sunny Wednesday afternoon. Fishing and playing on the docks, swimming and playing with ribbons are to be on the agenda for that day. It was all Allu can speak of.  Even the warming thoughts of the Moonglade were pushed aside for the doubts and images now set firmly in her head. For several weeks all she could think of was going to the Moonglade, but for now… it would have to wait. The glade would be there next week. Right now, she had to concentrate on her daughter and the possibility of an unfaithful husband.